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17: Relationships, the Holidays and Whiskey Jim… with Marta Hatter – Game Changer in Relationships

Marta Hatter

Marta Hatter is a psychotherapist who specializes in working with individuals experiencing depression, trauma, anxiety, PTSD and relationship issues. In addition, Marta also provides online counseling for cross-cultural workers, humanitarian aid workers, and missionaries from California who are living and working abroad.


How do you deal with the sense of obligation during the holidays?

Take a look at your own boundaries.  Not the ones that you place on other people, rather the ones that you place on yourself.  What you will or will not say or do and what environment you choose to be in.


At a holiday get-together, how do you deal with “Whiskey Jim” who drinks too much or “Opinionated Aunt Zelda?” 

Think through how this interaction is going to go, well ahead of time.  Decide in advance what your deal breaker is with someone’s behavior, if your boundaries are crossed.  Decide at what point you are politely going to leave.  Don’t try to decide this in real time as the situation is taking place.  Plan well in advance.


Point # 6 of Marta’s “Top 10 Tips for Everlasting Relationships:”  (Go to Marta’s web-site for all 10…  link below)

“When your button is pushed, ask them to clarify their intention.”

Think about it this way: H.I.T.   H=something Happens.   I=Interpretation.    T=Truth.

Something happens, you interpret it, and then that interpretation becomes your truth. All of which takes just a second.  So instead of having this become a pattern… transform the  “I” from Interpretation to Information.  Try to seek the information rather than interpreting what we think is going on and reacting from that place.


Best advice:

Seek out people and experiences that are life giving to you.  Whether that’s who you read or who you listen to.  When you have people that are life giving to you, you can then give back to so many others.


What you believe to be to true:

Every breath is a gift don’t wait.  Don’t wait to apologize, to be a game changer in business, or in anything… don’t wait.


How to find and connect with Marta Hatter:– Marta’s web-site.


Thanks for Listening!

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Until next time!

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